Tag Archives: TV networks

Words Misused by “Journalists,” or Reasons I Don’t Like Pinoy Network News

I’m a frustrated journalist, make no mistake about it. Thus, I can honestly say I type this piece with some envy. I once dreamed about a reporter myself, but not as Clark Kent, but as Peter Parker! But that is material for another post.

I got off on a good foundation as well, not learning through tabloids and thinly disguised editorials on TV. It was back in 3rd year high school Journalism. This was an elective subject, separate from the English we have been having for the past 2 years at the time. In our school, “elective” does not mean optional. Rather, this is that one subject per school grade that the curriculum makes students take to fill in one period. When I was in 3rd year, it was Basic Accounting and when I was in 4th year, it was Speech. The teacher was also special, as she was newly graduated. I do not know if she was idealistic or if it was her lifelong dream to teach, I have lost contact with her after graduating as she must have switched to another school, or she might have just followed other teachers and went abroad. When it was time for the subject, it was not the usual homework, lecture and seatwork plus assignment model. I must be getting old, but I found that novelty appealing. It gave me a new way to see the world, even though I did not continue to be a reporter. I still like the way I had to watch network news and not care about the content, but how the news gets made, done and served…

More Fun in the Philippines

More Fun in the Philippines

which gets me to the point of this article. Usually, people doing the reports are great. Like Atom Araullo or Maki Pulido, they brave real danger to bring you the news that matters. Even better when they can provide unbiased views of a certain issue that should be monitored by the the masses (an overused word by politics), more too often the stakeholders (this is a very overused word, but in corporate, not journalism) follow better than they follow Maya and Sir Chief. It used to be there was only CNN for you to get news 24-hours a day. Now you get ANC, which is still on cable, but you also get NewsTV on VHF and AksyonTV on UHF. We even get an all-news station on FM radio! But then sometimes you get these, shortcuts and booboos, dahil hindi na nakakatulog ang tagapagbalita:

1. Emotional/Emosyonal – No one cries anymore. No one gets angry, or frustrated, or broken down. They all get “emotional,” as if the victim’s mother were just reciting from rote memory and she starts to let loose when she finally finds out the dead child that had been found by the barangay captain was really theirs. (where did this scenario come from?) Come on, be a little more colorful! Lola Rapper Priscilla knows more words describing human feeling than just “emotional.”

By the way, a certain technique used by unimaginative reporters to elicit the emotional response is to ask, “How do you feel towards: your third cousin’s death/child’s rape by her favorite stuffed animal/the pitchfork swinging mob who watched your sex video?”

2. Riding in Tandem – I admit this may well be an invention of the PNP rather than the press, as when I first heard this used this was from a senior police officer (I forgot who) and some newscasters still say, angkas. But nowadays, riding in tandem this and riding in tandem that. The word is so awkward it forces the sound of bad word construction (see the envy here of not becoming a journalist? This is it in action.) uninformed by the rules of grammar and style into my eardrum. In the US, they describe it as riding shotgun, not riding in/of/by shotgun. I previously thought tandem to be the exclusive domain of words describing synchronized swimming. Now it means a modus operandi of petty crime by which two people ride on one motorcycle, with one driving and one shooting. Imagine Carl Johnson of Grand Theft Auto San Andreas described as committing crimes through riding in tandem?

By the way, I have a theory that this term is to describe criminals who commit crimes on motorbikes… while riding a tricycle, quite common as well.

3. Tagalisms – These include words in English that are used as derived “Filipino” or “Spanish” words. Common words are kaso– for legal case; inabandona– for abandoned, left; and a lot of -yon words: promosyon, relasyon, or posisyon. Funny enough, kunsumisyon does not translate to the English word, consummation. What are these for? Are these used as a prop for English speakers wondering what the verb or noun could mean? Are the news editors (not the newscasters, it is more accurate for them to be called newsreaders) too pressed for time for the next deadline to bother reaching for their Vicassan or UP Filipino Dictionary or just *gasp,* lazy?

Sadly, this is not limited to the journalistic profession. I found many Filipino textbooks back in high school and college talking about kontraktuwalisasyon, komunismo, and recipe books calling for krema. Thinking of style, and how Filipino is really used today, it is acceptable to say, “Pinagtalunan (instead of pinagdebatehan) kanina sa Senado (eh, what the hell, give them that) ang usapin ng contractualization (instead of the word pretending to be Tagalog).

Perhaps I can offer a Rule of Thumb. If it sounds good on Eat Bulaga, the Filipinos can understand it, use it. But that is material for another post.

Like this one, this gets discussed in Eat Bulaga by Joey De Leon all the time.

Like this one, this gets discussed in Eat Bulaga by Joey De Leon all the time.


Dirty Joke: Hypnotist

Here’s a joke that won’t be featured on one of those FM radio stations:

May isang magician na magaling sa hipnotismo. Sa sobrang galing niya, niyaya siyang magperform sa TV, a la Criss Angel at David Blaine. Naghipnotismo siya nang aso, nang kabayo at nang tao. Bilang pagtatapos, sinabi niya sa camera na kaya niyang i-hipnotismo ang audience na nanonood.

Pinatulog niya sa harap ng kamera ang libu-libong manonood. Pinasayaw niya nang Macarena ang mga lalaki at ang mga babae ay pinag-jumping jack nang 30 beses. Pinatahol niya ang mga bata at ang lahat ay pinag-head bang sa saliw ng tugtog na Lumayo Ka Man Sa Akin.

OK na sana ang lahat. Ang TV producer na nanonood sa tabi ay nagbibilang na ng kikitain ng miniseries nang natapilok ang magician at nasabi niya sa kamera, “AY, TAE!”

Moral: May silbi pa rin ang MTRCB.


Wika ng Pamamahayag

Mainit na talakayan ngayon ang paggamit ng “mother tongue” sa paaralan, at hindi laging Filipino o Tagalog ang mother tongue. Alam naman natin na buwan na naman ng wika at ewan ko ba kung bakit ngayon lang nagsusulputan ang mga issue na gaya nito o ngayon lang sila napapansin ng mga segment producer sa TV news. Kesyo sabi na dapat daw mahalin ang sariling wika at dapat gamitin, pero kung titignan, dapat ginagawa nila ang ipinapayo nila.

Marami kasing hindi kanais-nais na violation ang mga network news na iyan sa language natin. Isang halimbawa na lang ang pag-iimbento ng salita na hindi makikita sa dictionary (na walang gumagamit ng salitang talasalitaan). Isang dahilan sa paggamit ng mga ito e pagtitipid sa oras, dahil nga ang TV news e gahol sa oras. Kaya madalas, ang mga salitang ginagamit ay wala sa dictionary (?). Gaya na lang ng salitang kudos. Nauso ang salitang ito dahil kailangan ng mga publisher (tagapaglimbag) ng maiksing salita na kasingkahulugan ng pagbibigay-papuri o paghanga. Malas lang ng mga Pinoy, kasi may salita tayong kutos. Hindi paghanga ang nararamdaman sa taong kinutusan.

***

O sadya bang tumingin na lang kayo sa tabloid para sa inspiration?

from uncyclopedia.wikia.com

Ito kasi ang mga salitang kanilang ginagamit:

1. Arestado – paborito ni Arnold Clavio, may focus sa salitang ‘Tado! Galing sa arrested. Mas maikli ang salitang huli kung ang pinapatungkulan dito e yung mga hinuli ng pulis at bilanggo pero naghihintay pa ng trial. O gusto lang magmula ni Arnold Clavio kasi ginawan siya ng puppet.

2. Sumite – Galing sa submit. Madalas kapag ang balita ay galing sa Senado o alinmang opisina ng gobyerno (office of the government) na may iniimbestigahan (sinusuri). Ayaw siguro nila sa pasa o ipinasa. May konotasyon kasi ng pagpasa ng sisi. Pero ang submit ay may connotation din ng pagsuko at pagpapailalim.

3. Droga – galing sa salitang drug. Hindi lang sa kalye nakakarinig ang mga bata ng salitang kanto. Dahil sa paggamit nito (ng salita, hindi ng gamot, but you never know), nagkaroon ng konotasyon na masama ang droga.

4. Eskapo – Kung gusto nilang gumamit ng salitang kanto, may salita na puga. Iyan, salitang preso talaga iyan. Magandang pelikula din.

5. Mga salitang akala natin ay galing sa Spanish pero hindi pala – kaso (asunto), sesyon (session), plataporma (platform), atbp.

Que barbaridad!

***

Kung gagayahin na rin lang ng network news ang mga tabloid, nasaan na ang sex stories?


Noontime Show Hosts

– I read somewhere that Rico J. Puno now hosts a noontime show after Willie Revillame left. What were they thinking?

– People I’d like to see host a noontime show:

5. Carlos Celdran – Can he do more than yell at priests?

4. Mike Enriquez – Get him out of primetime news. I like Mike Enriquez, but if he’s going to entertain me, please let it not be at primetime news.

3. Shalala – You know, the guy who used to be Kuya Germs’ sidekick in his super early morning show? The one who now screams for his paycheck in Talentadong Pinoy? That one. Let him scream in front of the audience everyday. And they scream back. For two hours. Five days a week. And let him be a regular in Talentadong Pinoy, screaming.

2. The dog who plays Bantatay – I think he can do anything. Like Blue’s Clues.

1. John Lloyd Cruz – I saw him stand in for Willie during one of those suspensions and wow! He got charisma. Handles the audience well, asks questions nicely but plays well to what the people want. Better get him right after he gets unstuck.


On Carlos Celdran

First, I want to thank him for entertaining me last night on TV. That one was priceless, dressed up in a dark suit reminiscent of Jose Rizal and sneaking up on Cardinal Rosales and holding up a sign with “DAMASO” printed on it.

But, no. That was not bravery. That was just foolishness. As of this writing as far as I know his stunt did very little to push public opinion towards his side (pro-RH bill).

His Claim to Recent Fame

He won’t be (in)famous if he wasn’t arrested. That said, I admired him for his balls when he said he didn’t have any regrets for his actions. But excommunicated? No, a person brave enough (or stoked enough) to do that won’t be afraid of excommunication, not even counting his standard answer that he will join another religious group. There are enough Catholics in politics.

On his supporters making two fan pages on facebook, one calling for his release and one calling for his prolonged stay in jail, I found another funny thing to poke about. Yes, it is better that he stay in jail. Much better if in Fort Santiago, and people would pay to see him there ranting about his views. In that awfully hot suit. The state and the city of Manila will benefit from this. And the group he supports too.

Image from my_sarisari_store.typepad.com

What He Should Have Done

I admit I am a bit of a “performance artist” myself *wink, wink* and as an amateur to a professional I have a bit of advice to him, just like the classic Pinoy miron:

1. What he should have done is not to put the Filipino Catholic Church in a bad light. As a political strategist (a very amateur one, so please don’t monitor me, ISAFP) attacking a very old institution with the motive of undermining its credibility and the people’s trust in it is very risky and invites anarchy. All governments hate anarchy. Besides, in a formal debate that one could be construed as an argumentum ad hominem.

2. What he should have done is not to interrupt Mass. People know Mass is a serious affair, and would be confused if they should laugh at your stunt. Besides, it is a meal and interrupting meals is one unspoken violation of friendship with a Filipino.

3. What he should have done is not to display a placard with “DAMASO” printed on it. And emulating Rizal? He won’t pass as Rizal. He looks very mestizo. He is stocky. He sports a big forehead. Rizal had a big head. He is a tour guide. He should know how ignorant Filipinos are of literary figures.

4. What he should have done is make a video. He could have gone two ways, either post a unique, funny skit on youtube or engineered a homemade zex video. Either way it would have made noise for millions of people. Not just for the people hearing Mass.

Postscript

I thought I saw him somewhere. There are not very many mestizos around. Could he be related to my childhood idol, David “Battle of the Brains”  Celdran? Perhaps in a trippy magazine or a guest in one of RJ Ledesma’s shows.

Pustahan tayo, may kukuhang TV network sa kanya paglaya niya. 🙂


Thoughts for the Day # 28

As I was riding the bus home, I looked at the TV and thought it looked like a security camera. So when I got home and found people glued to the TV because of a hostage situation covered by the news, I thought two things:

– Kaya pala… and

– Holy Shrek! Walang Pilyang Kerubin!

But there was Pilyang Kerubin, even though it looked like it went through the merciless snips of their censors. Now you know my vice. 🙂

– I’m not writing more about the hostage “drama” (some say comedy). Tomorrow, the news will be all over it, with analysis from all sorts of angles like how they study Pacquiao’s fights. I’m not trivializing it, nor glorifying it. I’m condemning that kind of journalism that makes mountains out of anthills. Dahil walang mole sa dear old ‘Pinas.


Thoughts for the Day # 9

– Here’s an idea for a TV show:

I was watching the morning news program of TV5 and it struck me as how they sold themselves as being “cool” and not too serious like the other two networks. Trouble is, these three networks have worked hard over the years for a “fun” and “cool” morning show, and nothing is new.

Here’s what’s new.

They all feature the hosts reading headlines from the daily papers, broadsheets and tabloids. Why don’t they give a twist (and a prize, besides) so that they read at least one false news (something like, “Loren Legarda Gets Sued for Changing Pilipinas Kong Mahal lyrics”), and viewers get to guess which is it. It will be an exercise in critical thinking and help develop viewers’ sense of skepticism so they won’t accept everything they hear and see on TV.

If any network gets this going, I won’t sue them for my idea. Go ahead.